– Enjoying your single life?
– Well, yeah, sure. Who wouldn't?
– So, how long have you been free as bird?
– A couple of months.
– Exactly how many?
– Well, if you must know. (counting with fingers) One.. two...
(Interupting) – Twelve?
– Euhm, yes... Today actually.
– 12? You've been single for 12 months, that's one year! What are you? Some kind of religious nut? Took a wow of chastity?
– I'm not religious.... Cheers!
– So a nut then?
– Of cource I'm not A nut... More like a whole warehouse full of them.
– For the love of God, why? How did this happen? Don't you like girls or what?
– I love girls, a lot ! I know everything about girls.
– So, can't find one good one, huh?
– That's not it.
– Then why?
– I know too much about girls, that's why I don't want one.
– Why?
– The fantasy about a girl will always be better than the girl. There just isn't any girls that will be that slutty and happy as they are be in my head. That combination of imagination, lust, outfits, sensuality, toys, catlike flexibility, beauty, looks and intelligence, all skillfully applied to achive the best sex there is on the planet, is totally irresistable. And that's just me, then there is the girl too!
– Not a religious nut, not A nut, just a pervert with a bunch of good fantasies?
– Well I have one. A dream I had actually, don't know if it came to me 'cuz I was watching the mating patterns of migrating birds on Discovery or something.
– A dream?
– Yes, I lovely, beautiful dream.
– This should be good.
– Well it is, the dream begins with a house, a house I have built, overlooking the ocean, with a pool that is right at the edge of the property that is next to the ocean. Standing at the right spot the pool seems to continue into the ocean.
– Yes I have seen that, almost every beach house in California has it.
– I just love it. Well I wake up in this dream house that I have built, and I start taking the stairs down to the kitchen. While I'm in the stainless steel staircase overlooking the kitchen I see this girl I have never seen before, standing by the stove.
– Getting better...
– She is blonde with long wavy hair, beautiful and naked except that she is wearing one of my blue shirts. She is making pancakes for breakfast. And she is singing and dancing slowly with a spatula in her hand to the music on the radio. Apparently she and her kid, a really cute four year old girl, has found my house during the night and decided to move in there while I was sleeping. Just as bird do, the male build the nest, the femalde decides it is good enough and decides to nest there. I just love that idea, I wish girls would do that for real, It would be so much simpler. All this is a dream I actually had one night.
– Good one, that should keep that team of scientist that hold quarterly conferences in Switzerland discussing exctly what is wrong with you busy for a while.
– Yes, I imagine it would. They have just finished a year long study on how I use the phrase "I prefer blondes" and have just find a good analogy and they are very proud of it.
– What analogy?
– They came up with that I use the term "I prefer blondes" in the same way as a heroin addict "prefer heroin over instant coffe". That's pretty good I think. Accurate.
– Well, I think you are wasting your money.
– You are probably right, would you like some nuts? Apparently I have a warehouse full of them.
– You didn't tell me why you are celebrating this day?
– You wouldn't understand.
– Try me.
– Well today marks an occation, I put my happiness aside to make sure someone else that I loved would be happy, for the rest of her life.
– Cheers! Bottoms up!
– The funny thing is, she never understood that. Cheers!